No Place Like Home
by miss-motormouth
Summary: Spike...Dawn...Buffy...snow...finding your way...it's kinda hard to summarise...read and review...


Title: No Place Like Home. Author: Emily  
  
Rating: PG 13, maybe a mild R Category: Crap, it beats me. Mostly Spike/Dawn but mention of Spike/Buffy Spoilers/Timeline: No particular spoilers, very AU. Summary: Spike, Dawn, Buffy, snow, finding your way... I can't really summarise, read it :) Disclaimer: Not mine or I wouldn't have to write crazy fic about them. Feedback: Please yes, I'd love to know what you think. Pipergal33@yahoo.co.uk  
  
~ No Place Like Home ~  
  
The snow starts to fall outside, large heavy flakes brushing across the ground and trees. It falls and it's smothering.  
  
* * *  
  
He's fucking one sister and in love with the other. He knows - he knows it's wrong and tries to ignore the way that it's slowly killing him, softly and deeply.  
  
Sometimes he wonders what he's doing, most of the time though he just does it. That's what he's always done. It just never mattered before.  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
She got lost someplace and occasionally her hands claw up the walls that surround her, scratching till it bleeds. At least that way it feels like she's trying to get out.  
  
Truth is, she doesn't seem to care anymore. She goes to him and forgets the way it was before. It seems like it's always been this way and that's better. He's a welcome escape.  
  
Oh her heart's not in it, her heart hasn't been in anything for a long time. She senses he feels the same and that stings a little because she's always wanted someone to love her. Doesn't matter if she doesn't feel the same but if someone loved her.that would mean something, right? It would mean she mattered. Once long ago there was a time when she loved someone but that's done and now it's just another thing she wants to forget.  
  
So many things.  
  
She stops suddenly in her tracks. There are too many things. She doesn't want to add one more to the list.  
  
The girl turns with sudden resolution; she doesn't know where she's going but she knows she's going.  
  
* * *  
  
He waits and she doesn't come. He's not surprised, he always knew she'd be going eventually.  
  
After they fucked a look would come into her eyes, telling of the past and things she'd rather forget. Now he's become one of those things and it stings a little but it's not the bruise he expected.  
  
He feels a lightness upon him and it's been a while since he's felt anything but darkness. The new feeling surprises him, he never knew it was possible for his kind to feel this way and he steps outside.  
  
* * *  
  
She's even more lost than her sister. Maybe it's because she was never really found. She's new to this place in more ways than one and it doesn't quite make sense to her.  
  
It's cold here. Cold and huge and she doesn't know how she fits in. There's never really been a place for her here and she doesn't know how to make one. There are so many things she doesn't know. Sometimes she wishes someone would help her, show her, save her.  
  
It's cold here and she feels more alone than she should. Snow is falling and she remembers long gone Christmases that are too far gone for her to touch. Silver tears glisten on her cheeks and she's surprised. She doesn't usually cry. She learnt not to a long time ago but now she somehow is. She doesn't question it or ask why, instead she closes her eyes and lets it be.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
He's not as cold as he used to be. He's always been cold but now along with the lightness a warmth has arrived and strangely he welcomes it. Snow is falling, down and over the tombstones, and he remembers the way snow felt when he was human, the taste of it, the touch of it. The feeling. His eyes close in a child like gesture and he lets it fall. He lets it all fall.  
  
* * *  
  
She's going, and that makes her smile. It's been a while since she last smiled and she likes the feeling. Where she's going she's not certain. Anywhere will do. Maybe she should start with home. It doesn't matter. She doesn't need someone to find her to be found. She gets that now and that makes her smile too. The pretty blond girl scoops up a handful of snow and lets it slip through her fingers. It falls but everything else remains intact. Buffy closes her eyes because maybe she matters a little more than she'd thought.  
  
* * *  
  
Spike senses her through the snow and his eyes open, searching for the small figure sitting on the ground, arms wrapped around her knees. More unfamiliar feelings touch him and he welcomes those too. She looks up and half smiles at him, pushing some hair out of her face. He half smiles too and sits beside her on the dark ground that's rapidly becoming speckled with white. He's not so alone here and maybe if he remembered how it was to be happy that's the word he would use to describe this new feeling.  
  
* * *  
  
Dawn closes her eyes again, the tears have faded now. She thinks that maybe everything fades eventually. But now, it's bright, and not as cold as she'd thought. She almost feels a warmth and she embraces it. She embraces the moment as they sit there in a peaceful silence, an understanding and it doesn't fade. Now she thinks that maybe not everything fades, that some things can stay.  
  
* * *  
  
Buffy smiles once more when she sees them sitting there in the snow. She feels it fall on her face and she remembers the things she wanted to forget and they're not as bad as she remembered. She embraces them, and she embraces the tears. It's okay for her to cry. It's okay. Her sister looks at home for once and that makes her cry too. Spike, he looks free, almost happy and she's not angry. It doesn't sting anymore.  
  
* * *  
  
Buffy turns and walks through the snow, feet making footprints that will lead to a place called home. She knows the way now.  
  
Dawn sits there, her eyes closed, her head leaning lightly against Spike's shoulder and she knows there's a place called home.  
  
Spike, he never really had a home but now he thinks maybe he might. He knows - he knows this is right and he feels like he's alive.  
  
* * *  
  
The snow keeps on falling outside, large heavy flakes brushing across the ground and trees. It falls and now it's like air.  
  
Fin. 


End file.
